3resilience

One of these days, I will bring a camera to school, and befuddle the students with the sight of a teacher snapping photos of the sunrise and of them. The light falls on the school so seductively: and I say this purely out of appreciation for the architecture, if not for anything else. It really is a beautiful place, and one can always see the sky, from wherever you are, by looking out the window. It is a place that refuses to be a party to depression, I think; how can one remain depressed once one steps out of the buildings and is greeted by the grand vistas? I could be right in the middle of setting a set of readings, with a headache gathering force silently behind my eyes, and then I'd happen to look up at a sudden sound, and be forced to pause by the view that simply needs to be enjoyed.

Had breakfast with some of the PE teachers today, and met my old EDrama teachers and Mr. Hon. I still find it disconcerting that so many people find me familiar, and even remember who I am. It is flattering, to be sure; and I wonder what sort of mental image of me has survived all these years in their memories. I would like to hear what they remember of me: I imagine it'd be like meeting my younger self. It'd be an interesting meeting, I think, because if returning to school has shown me anything, it has shown me that I have changed more than I thought, grown, for better or worse. And as I wrote in Elsewhere, change is what makes returning so meaningful, because it allows you to recognise what has been important enough to stay the same through all this time and despite your absence.

In taking my classes, I realise that one of them especially has that energy that I remember from my own days there, that kind of spontaneous eagerness and frankenss that facilitates such exuberant and productive participation in the learning process. I am not so much teaching them: rather, they are learning from each other, and I am more of a conduit. I guess partly this is because of their youth, and also, partly because there is less of a need to compete, without the spectre of the 'O' Levels hanging over their heads. For all its ill effects in the later years, the Through-Train programme does liberate classrooms in the younger levels, allowing students the flexibility to experiment with knowledge, and the teachers to experiment with methodology.

And I find this flexibility exhilarating enough to keep me back in school well into the evenings, typing out new exercises, reading stuff I'd like to give to the kids. The Sci Fi unit we're doing now returns me to my first love, and I'm toying with the idea of investigating the genre in other media besides the written word. Thinking of finding a way to bring in Minority Report next week, and also of extracting the beginning of Watchmen for them, and then doing an investigation of Sci Fi storytelling in the most tempting medium there is: computer games. What I need now is time: and my tuition commitments coming up sit rather uncomfortably with these new projects.

But yeah: lessons now are so liberalised that teachers can indulge themselves in teaching what they want. Which is great for a positive class environment, but may detract from the whole purpose of the curriculum. In other words, in getting all obsessed with Sci Fi and its fun, I could lose sight of the objective of the Sci Fi unit, which is to develop the kids' ability to write artistically and effectively, using this genre as a template. Heh, I reckon, if I'm not careful, English lessons will become Film Studies 101.

But as far as problems go, this is a delightful problem to have to contend with, where practically any solution holds at least some promise of being fun and rewarding. Yep, it feels good to be back in an academic environment, even if I'm on the other side of the table again. Tapping back into that sense of energy, that sense of direction that you get in a school like Chinese High: it's invigorating and, dare I say it, rejuvenating.

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Speaking of rejuvenation: taking the old 171 from school to town today, I was surprised to find that Bukit Timah Road and Orchard Road have undergone some startling new development. Modernist, even Cubist houses are appearing near the school, and Orchard Road is being transformed into a really fascinating landscape, with the new ultraposh condos at Newton, the sleek St. Regis serviced appartments, Ion Orchard taking shape, and Somerset Central coming along fine. There is something captivatingly tantalising about a building under construction: this is how a vision is made real, in a very dramatic, concrete way. And even the Singapore Power building has gotten shiny new silver cladding. And it strikes me, you know? The physical beauty of this city is surprising. And the people must live up to the environment that they are building, must redevelop themselves to become as sophisticated as the skyline that they are constructing.