It strikes me how many coincidences happen in my lessons with my kids. I swear, I don't plan these things at all, but take these for example. Firstly, I give one of my classes a story from the Arthur C. Clarke short story collection that I own, and when we're doing Newspaper Writing, we examined the article on Clarke's death. Next, I think of showing the class George Clooney's Good Night and Good Luck for a short introduction to News Ethics, and TIME Magazine obligingly publishes a feature on Clooney himself, which we used to investigate feature writing. In that article, Joel Stein mentions Charles Kuralt, a legendary chronicler of the American grassroots; and Charles Kuralt is mentioned in the latest and last comprehension exercise I'm doing with my Sec 2s. And on an unrelated note, I'm considering the merits of showing my Sec 3 class Band of Brothers to discuss leadership, and what would Mum bring back from school than the 10th anniversary publication put out by SAFTI MI.
The connections strike me because of their randomness. Draw what meaning you will from them, for whatever meaning I interpret from this will be the meaning I superimpose onto it, I am quite sure. For me to interpret this is actually for me to interpret my own motivations for such an interpretations. But I feel compelled to say at least this much: these just go towards highlighting the specialness of this period of teaching to me.
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To my own surprise, I find myself on top of my marking. Batch after batch of scripts join the OUT pile satisfyingly, the most major of which is the set of expository essays for the CSE classes, topped off with its own marker's report and the full breakdown of marks. Doing the real legwork of the actual marking and grading is fulfilling in its own way, but when you finally come to the stage of compiling your statistics, then you know that you're really done. It's like putting the finishing touches on a long and detailed essay, except that you don't get it back once you submit it to your vetters.
Anyway, been marking comprehensions now that I've gotten all the essays out of the way, and I realise that I've actually become quite proficient at it (which, I have to add as a caveat, is not the same as being good at it). Once enough scripts are marked, I can memorise the answers and then the marking really begins in earnest, and I enter a sort of trance, with the answers running through my mind like a mantra. It also helps that this particular comprehension exercise is easier to mark, having more straightforward answers. And today, when I wrapped up today's quota of marking at the Soup Spoon at Raffles City, it struck me that I won't have the time to really capitalise on this new ability. And a part of me does feel that it's a pity to let something that had developed so far die out again, even if the development had taken place in spite of myself rather than due to any conscious effort.
It is also time to start thinking about the exit. Marks are to be compiled, results submitted, curricular materials straightened out and reports filed to facilitate the handover back to the real teachers. And, on another level, it is approaching the time to redefine the relationship with my kids on another level. It seems odd to me that I should find myself in the position of having old students, in the way that my past teachers treat me as an old student. It seems unnatural somehow, as if I were usurping an honour reserved for real teachers, who stick it out with their classes for years on end and see their charges not only through the end-of-year examinations, but also up till graduation. That is a different kind of commitment, and warrants the accolades that are its due. But then again, on another level, it would be odd to just be Daniel again. Just as my old teachers are still referred to by their last names even though they are my colleagues now, and just like my men from Army still don't call me by my first name, I think it would also be the case with my kids now. I begin to realise that there is something in being a teacher that you cannot put down even after you leave the profession. You build relationships based on a particular persona, a persona that you develop exclusively for the purpose and circumstances of the classroom, and to give up that persona is to threaten the fabric of the links that are founded upon it. And I continue to call Ms. Ong Ms. Ong because I value what was built previously in class, and to go on to a first-name basis would, to me, constitute an abandonment of at least a part of that previous establishment. And with respect to my kids, I don't want to lose what we've built; and I hope they don't want to lose what we've done over these months either.
And already, URA is beckoning. I've learned that old friends and acquaintances have been working there all this while, and when I join the organisation on the 12th, I won't be so totally adrift after all. It's a good thing and a bad thing; an anchor point enhances the feeling of security, but bears with it a risk of dependency. You may become so enamoured with the stability and the promise of familiarity that you neglect to use it as a starting point to expand your perspective and your experience. Nonetheless, I look forward to the change in environment, and the chance to finally get a sense of what I'm actually signing up for.
Come August, then, I'll have a nicely rounded out gap year experience. The last days of the Army, the copious travel, teaching, and even getting my feet wet in the actual substance of URA. Life has really started to get back up to speed, and in some ways has actually exceeded what has been the case before. The preparations are being completed; and as always, I am eager to really get started on the actual task of getting on with my life.
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And today was the Combined Sports Meet for NYGH, TCHS, HCJC (out of nostalgia, I refuse to use the new official name for the school) and the International School. This is a sight that is only seen once a year, and I thought it best to snap it before I missed it. Anyway, all these photos being accumulated by my trusty phone will eventually, I think, make it into a consolidated album on Singapore, one that will be eminently mobile, and equally useful as a tool for introductions and as a salve for homesickness. But we will see...this idea will join the long queue of ideas for the remaining months before August.
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