Gleam

The world is indeed a beautiful place.

If I time it right and leave the office just as the white light is starting to yellow, I can reach City Hall on foot just in time for the goldbursts. And what goldbursts they have been lately! Every day, knocking off work is not just a relief from a day of toil; but you also look forward to it to see what the sky will offer. And when I see such a riot of colours, I feel as if the world itself were in equilibrium, and that I am where I need to be. There is harmony between what the world can give and what I want to find in it.

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Yesterday, got invited to an old friend's place for a de facto birthday party. We were treated to pot after pot of top-grade Chinese tea, supplemented at mealtimes with homemade potluck offerings (yes, that means I did cook; I can theoretically do stir fried noodles now, and thankfully it was well received, but I wouldn't push my luck too far) that ranged from devilled eggs with surprise fillings to a casserole of vegetables, portions of potato salad and, for dessert, watermelon-coloured agar-agar and a superb blueberry cheesecake. And on top of that, the gathering alternated between lazy conversation around the teapots and our host's rather eclectic taste in movies.

The urgency of finality manifested itself interestingly in this case. We were languid from tea, food and film, and certainly there wasn't the kind of impatience that you get from standing on the brink of tomorrow. It was a slow, well-spent Sunday. But the awareness that we may not get to do this again for years added a certain sharpness to the experience, so that every sensation was more acutely felt. One moves beyond gorging oneself on the present to savouring the moment.

He had told us to leave off bringing gifts, because he would feel uncomfortable receiving them, so in an ironic twist, I came away with a belated but beautifully crafted box instead, with the Arabic and Chinese characters for "book" intertwined together in an exquisite dance of meaning. I count it as the most beautiful homemade gift I've ever had the pleasure of receiving. It shall take centrestage in my new accommodations come August.

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Today at work, spent the time filling up more forms, so that now I'm more or less poised to go for the Embassy interview, which I've scheduled on Thursday early in the morning. It is therapeutic to fill in forms, I find. There is a simple satisfaction in seeing the fields filling up with raw data - data that is straightforward, that can be found, gathered and presented clearly. I imagine harvesting an orchard has a similar sort of pleasure, although the intensity is doubtlessly different, as the pleasure is alloyed with so many other sensations in the field. Well - at least it is fulfilling, until I accidentally close the form and erase a day's work at one go.

Anyway, had to do an audit of all the countries I've ever visited in the past ten years to fill in one of the forms. It presents an interesting picture: I have been to Malaysia 13 times in the past 10 years, and at least once every other year. The next runner-up is Hong Kong, with three times in the past 10 years. In all I've gone abroad 22 times in the past 10 years (not counting the overseas exercises in Army), but I really haven't been to that many different places. It seems that I return more regularly to previously visited places more often than I had thought; I seem to place more emphasis on understanding a place deeply, than experiencing as many places as possible. What does that say about what I look for in travel? Maybe I'll think about it more one day.

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Popped down to Suntec after work to buy some Royce' chocs. Heard that they were good, and my URA colleagues will be having a get-together lunch tomorrow, which makes it a good time to say thank-you for their help and immersion during this internship. It has been productive and enjoyable. It has also been insightful. I cannot rightly ask for more, I think. Anyway, so there I was, in the Royce' shop, looking at these innocuous boxes of chocolates. They did not look as flashy and high-class as Godiva or Leonidas chocs, and for less than $15 a box, they certainly don't seem so highbrow.

But once I tried the samples, the impression changed entirely. The creaminess and sweetness of the chocolates defy description. The Japanese makers of these fine sweets have really done themselves proud with these creations. And to top it all off, the service was warm and helpful, and you walk away from the counter with your boxes of chocs packed in an insulated bag with dry ice packs, and feeling as if you had cheated them. Suffice to say that I can't wait to unveil them over lunch tomorrow, if only so I can sink my teeth into another morsel of those chocs again!

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A thought occurred to me as I was walking from my medical checkup at DBS Tower 2 to another clinic for a chest X-ray (it's standard procedure for scholars, apparently, to ensure that you are a sound investment and not defective in any way). Had been reading some guides put out by the USEIC on US culture, which had gone on at length about how Americans value individuality. Indivi-duality. There is irony there. A better poet would make more of it. But as I no longer have the discipline or patience to write poetry, maybe I'll take it up in a story one day.

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And as always, August moves closer by the day. Parents are now trying to find a flight to join me in New York on the 25th, at the end of CUE and as the normal orientation starts. I am waiting for my appointment at the US Embassy on Thursday; finally, after years of passing it on the bus, I will actually have cause to step inside it. It is an exhilarating time, this; every day is suffused with anticipation. And it feels as if nothing can dampen this feeling, because from my perspective, anything that can conceivably happen in between now and August will pale in comparison with what August promises. I feel as if nothing can prevent me from enjoying this, the run-up to my own departure.